how to read her

entp:

handcuff in prison but has this adam levine look. interesting, diff, high confidence, spunk.

estp: always clear confidence in any situation. fresh. clear mind. no deep transition.

aj type. looking for random guy. no feelings, no emotions, just random. well test to see if ur really the man with no feelings. like a car passing u by in the rain feeling. well do stunt on motorcyle and laugh. she is blank for now but once feeling comes she will want to feeling something. shock and awe works for those girls. sports athelete will be random since no ffeeling with come from the athlete. her eyes will be first a look to test. pissed with pouded lips. say it again and she will go or eventually go. she is testing that u r the guy. she wont go but u have to keep the car wind flow going. she will eventually break and u got no strings attached. maybe in her past those car wind guys broke to someone else right away.

tasha saw me as charming. she wanted to get her ego boosted her want to feel good. everything was good till my scratchy vibe of feelings came in . maybe she would break in that state and cry. wants to see if u can handle it. if u can she will be pleasing u. if u react or judge she will run.

cool and dangerous with aj type goth makeup. since stranger hasnt come in, she wants to have some fun.

esfp blonde types are acting like 6 year old. thats y the joke about her that she chases lolipop. dont get serious with her. she cant change bopping feeling and moves with u.

aj type goes for athlete bc no feelings. he is strong. eventually go for stranger as soon as feelings get in. if she is crying in the club and about to have breakthrough. car wind man can just say lets go. and lets go. she might check if he can pull off or no. if not she will give a bigger shit test. after she realizes u will remain in character, she gives in to that energy. thats y they say u should have fought for her to get her those feelings. when im in club, im like that guy but aj version. looks play part since im random car wind guy now. to pull off away from look . if u keeps car wind guy flow and she is with someone, as soon as she feels current bf has feelings for her she will run to the new car wind guy. if she is about to have breakthrough while going for that guy, u must hold her. she is about to have a breakthrough. she marrries guy if he can pull it off. sometimes they would go for carwind guys vibe together. if u r charming and she has a cold look. not mean but frozen look. tell her ayy. lets go with no feelings at all. bb was lets go attitude but fun.

bubbly girl if she is having breakthrough will be vulnerable. her face is not crying but having breathing issues type of look. ends up dont know y they hooked  up equal one night stand. cant go with guy if has feelings when approaching. maybe she likes the cologne smell reminds of her ex. let her sniff and enjoy u. no feelings. go like a bullet.

cool dangerous can pick her up cause he kind of gets her. will get more random lays from those type of women. he might now her bodylanguage and just go for her.

aj might slap since she got the car wind guy when she slapped him. her slap with be if beginner alil emotional in eyes. once use to slapping guys and get train guy she will not even flinch. thats y those guys get there internal feelings. we get external feelings.

gothic look was fine extreme but when tested u got nervous. in order to pull that look its no emotions and lets go. lets go by arm cut like car wind.

maybe thats y she goes for that mystery look. different alienated feeling. he makes her laugh cause he is off. or adam leving type of being confident cool. no emotion feeling. from his side he has had a pitfall

 

That’s y glack guys they say have super confidence. Lets go . those r the white girls that gone in black like autin with ice tea

 

Guy getting nervous choking he doesn’t know who he is with girl with such experience.

 

Girl with daddy issues might go for david dhovny guy cause he is a lyrica genius drown in alcohol like daddy.

Pretty boy they just want on his arm so has high demands and wants brad pitt. Old women treat herself as reward or if crying she is broken

Always smiling charming guy geets her at the end than. Don’t be too charming pic matt bomer as car salesman.

Bad girls enjoying the scene or bad girls frozen

Still a virgin in each phase. Have to get through the phase. That’s what pua say. To go out and practice. Before u master it or get comfortable u quit and start crying/depress. Still a virgin to life. Go out and do something. Whining like little girl . cant believe he pass that gothic phase. Do it happy ur like adam Levine.

Quiet girl will go for estp. Cause nice respectful and confident persistence.

Richey, sydd virgin phases. Barrett phase when bold was frozen

Depression was bitchy whiny crying lonely phase. Everytime ur about to pass to new level u quit. U want to bitch and whine complain. Clothes get more darker again. Rinse repeat lather. Stick with phase and go for it

 

Approaching black girls too charming. Add cool, less smile, add lil dangerous. Maybe that’s y vick is like seek a psychic since ur not grown up yet. Choose a path and become the man

Played card to whiny and bitchy. Gotta keep cool rather than a wussie.

Guy has no feelings. No emotions. Barely  very few girls look for guys that can charm them.  

Men dont approach you = RISE OF LAZY MEN ?

If women keep saying there aren’t enough good, marrying-aged, stable men to choose from and men keep saying there are plenty of good men to choose from, except women aren’t choosing those men, which one is right, men or women? Honestly, the answer is closer to, “both” than either party being outright wrong. While there are plenty of reasons for why this situation exist, today I want to focus on the evolution of the lazy man and how his rise to power complicates the dating environment for everyone…

In the Beginning

When it comes to pursuing women, most modern men of potential marrying age and reasonable stability are lazy.There, I said it. There are a number of reasons why men are lazy, and not all of those reasons are their fault, but that doesn’t change the fact that they are lazy when it comes to dating, courting, and well, just about anything that doesn’t directly benefit them or have a defined, measurable return on investment. How did this happen?

Most young (and some grown) men are not self-sufficient.

When men are young and generally have nothing to offer the dating pool other than game, a winning smile and a charming personality, they are beyond aggressive when it comes to pursuing women. More importantly, they don’t need to justify their pursuits. The only thing they desire is the company of a woman. They don’t demand that she know how to cook, remain beautiful at all times and always weigh a certain amount, or whatever other arbitrarily subjective measurement of a woman Twitter/Facebook is arguing about this week. No, all men want for their efforts when they’re young is a woman.



If you disagree, you need travel no further than your local 18 – 21+ club and bask in the the vigor those young men will demonstrate in their pursuit of everything that resembles a woman. It’s almost awe-inspiring. Using myself as an example, my college-aged friends and I literally referred to this period as, “chasing” or “putting in work.”

Note: If you’re like the psychologist from the beginning of Baby Boy whose narrative explored the unspoken meaning of words behind black men referring to their home as “the crib” and their friends as “boys,” you might take a moment to reflect on the meaning behind the various slang terms men use to opine on their feelings toward any given number of actions. Above, we referred to approaching women as “work” in one instance, even though many women think approaching women is easy and men enjoy doing so. This is not necessarily the same viewpoint men have of the action, but we recognize it is a necessary evil as a means to an end – meeting women. As another slang term goes, “a close mouth doesn’t get fed.” However, when’s the last time you referred to a hobby you enjoyed as “work”?

Since we didn’t have much to offer women in the form of drinks and other material purchases (a nice way of saying we were broke), we had to find a way to get women to find us interesting, worthy of their time & phone numbers, and worthy of their companionship by using some form of persuasion involve significant monetary expenditures. Compare your younger observations with a club; lounge; or happening spot where marriageable-aged people frequent. Of course, if  the atmosphere of places where you hang out isn’t noticeably different from when you were closer to 21 versus 31, then you might want to re-evaluate some other areas of your life. No judgement!

As we get older and our station in life improves, men start to become, you guessed it, lazier. Before, we’d go to the club and we’d consider it a “bad night” if we didn’t get at least 10+ numbers between the group. In our mid-20s, we found we spent less and less time in the sole pursuit of women. Quality overtook quantity. Why chase after 10 numbers from five 2′s, three 5′s, and two 7′s, when we could apply ourselves and maybe get 3 numbers from two 8′s and one 10?

Some nights we were content simply heading out and having a good time. If we got 10 numbers or 0 numbers it really didn’t matter. The experience became greater than the pursuit. It wasn’t that we weren’t interested in meeting women. It’s that our priorities changed. Meeting a woman or group of women was cool, but it wasn’t the only determining factor for whether we had a “good night,” especially when experience had taught us that the majority of women we meet will not result in something particularly meaningful – and that was ok. We can all have a good time and it doesn’t have to go anywhere (see the VIP lounge). But, as men, we had to find other measures of what defined a good time besides meeting large quantities of strange women with no future beyond 24-hours.

We slowly accepted that we didn’t have to live the “YOLO” lifestyle every night, because chances are we could do it again another weekend, in another club, or in another city. While we didn’t see it this way as men, women began to view our approaches as increasingly lazier. They were right, too. We weren’t chasing them as much and some in the group even began to declare that they were over chasing women and putting in work, period. They were “retiring.” When it came to courting, some men were content becoming more like…women.

Instead of pursuing women and impressing them, these men began to expect women to pursue and impress them (known as ‘Diva Dudes’ in some circles). In their minds, they had put in sufficient work in their younger days. Now that they were in a better place, their expectations of what they should be expected to do to meet women changed as well. As a former well-paid Director confided in me once, “you have to work really hard to get to a point where you don’t hardly work.”

Rise of the Lazy Man

Today, right or wrong, it’s as if modern men have to be sold on the benefits of a committed relationship/marriage. Entire groups of marriageable-aged men are perfectly content not approaching, courting, or putting in any significant amount of work to meet marriageable-aged women. Even worse, a lot of them don’t have to. Grown men whom I’ve personally witnessed chase women across clubs, lounges, bars, parking lots, stores and everywhere in between in their youth now see a woman of interest and let her walk on by, no Isaac Hayes. “There’ll be another one,” they claim in tones ranging from apathy to contempt.

When men are young, women treat them like they aren’t in demand and they’re not afraid to let him know it. As an older man, he has the opportunity to feel what it’s like to be in demand himself, which dictates how he approaches dating. As the saying goes, “absolute power, corrupts absolutely.” In some cases, these men becoming increasingly lazy and their search for women is itself much pickier. Before, he was simply looking for a woman; whereas now he is looking for a wife, maybe. Although, without balance, his standards/preferences may dictate that any woman he settles down with must be perfect.

Rather than pursue 10 women in which he might only have moderate interest; he focuses on the one or two women he has a definite interest in. So, in addition to being lazy, ”good men” are selectively approaching; whereas, women are still approached by the same young men and men who have nothing to offer, since these men must overcome having less by approaching more. Since many women – regardless of age – wait for men to approach them, it might seem like there are fewer “good men” available, because from her perspective it’s rare that a “good man” ever shows up.

Life is a dance between what you desire most and what you fear most

Change your life= make new choices

What you focus on what you feel

What do things mean= if meaning
no one loves me
economy down = work harder
end or beginning?
beginning of relationship or end of relationship

little choices of what to believe about to there people

overwhelming: quit or hit it stronger?

knowing how to direct your state

your lifestory/blueprint: some people think life is about this

whatever you believe who your life is suppose to be = we fight it or go with it ?

what you want most and what you fear most

what we want and what we need?

Life in a crisis = demands a change = we have to grow

whatever gets rewards get reinforced

do it longer and becomes part of your personality = you live it

if you want a breakthrough = it is not your fault

5 Steps to change

1. If you are in a crisis, see it as it is. Not worse than it is.

See what the problem is and dont make it so horrific that you just give up

2. Get to the truth and deal with it.

Job you worked day and night. Gave it your best and didnt get it. Industry is gone. Deal with the card you have dealt with.

3. Get a vision and get strong

4. Get a role model and learn their strategies

5. Give much more than you expect to give


Answer these:

Toughest time of your life and you went through (Been through hell and back)?

What strategy or you met someone or clicked in your faith that pulled you through that time? What is it a belief?

What was your life before the crisis?

What did you to do? What did you do to get through that situation? What skill did do you get through it?

How is your life better today since you went through that crisis? Are you more hopeful? Are you happier today cause you of contrast of life?

aloneville

Hitting the age 33, I just feel more alone than ever. From no friends to no one to call. Went out back in the nightclub scene and I did not enjoy it. I just want to sit home and share my life with that special someone. I dont want to go back the way things were.....

I guess I just want to be in a place called HOME. But I am not gifted in that way. Put on my confidence, charming, responsible face. Suck it up and stay away from the negative

 

Every day I'm a star in the city
Walk the streets like a wanted man
All the time got my shine looking pretty
Motherfuckers all know who I am
Every day feel the heat in the city
Like the barrel of a smoking gun
Read the signs, see the lights - they're so pretty
You're the one now turn me on
(Hey) give it all up for me
(Hey) give it all up for me
(Hey) give it all up for me
Every day I'm alive in the city
She's a fire that lives by the sun
On the street looking fine, looking pretty
She sucks the heat off my - gun
I will eat you alive in the city
While they pull up in fancy cars
Drinking wine, wasting time, you are pretty
Politicians, movie stars
(Hey) give it all up for me
(Hey) give it all up for me
(Hey) give it all up for me
City boy life
(Hey) give it all up for me
(Hey) give it all up for me
(Hey) give it all up for me
City boy life
Fine wine, fast cars, true lies, dark flaws
Every day I'm a star in the city
Walk the streets like a loaded gun
All the time, got my shine, looking pretty
Everybody now turn me on
(Hey) give it all up for me
(Hey) give it all up for me
(Hey) give it all up for me
This motherfucking life
(Hey) give it all up for me
(Hey) give it all up for me
(Hey) give it all up for me
City boy life

Brady Bunch

As an Istj but not having the fundamentals can leave you wandering alone into a dark room. Being on your own, even when you dont want to, leaves you with an empty feeling. Looking back and realizing the dream of having that lifestyle was destroyed a while ago. Eventually family parties, weddings made you nauseous. Something didnt seem right. Family portraits to outings left a bad taste in your mouth causing depression.

Since childhood not having the brady bunch taste makes you different. Eventually you realize that the dream you had as a kid has changed. There is nothing wrong with the change, just the players are in a different scenario. The J world is too different. Your look, style, swag, personality changes as time goes on. Sitting with family and not relating to anyone is not a bad thing. Its just not your scene. Once you accept and move on, the darkside fades. You grow and move on.